When I recently re-read this poem by Mary Elizabeth Frye I started crying. It reminded me of Koko, and all the things that Koko was to me. While it wasn't my first time reading the poem, I seemed to have forgotten about it until I saw it at my vet's office on Saturday. I don't know whom they had dedicated it to, but it immediately jumped at me full of meaning. We still don't know what happened to him, so the line 'I do not die' feels very appropriate, because that way I can just go on believing that he was somehow returned to the universe.

Do not stand at my grave and weep,

I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am in a thousand winds that blow,

I am the softly falling snow.

I am the gentle showers of rain,

I am the fields of ripening grain.

I am in the morning hush,

I am in the graceful rush

Of beautiful birds in circling flight,

I am the starshine of the night.

I am in the flowers that bloom,

I am in a quiet room.

I am in the birds that sing,

I am in each lovely thing.

Do not stand at my grave and cry,

I am not there. I do not die.

I realized that this is the last picture that I ever took of him. I was actually trying to get a shot of the budgies scheming against me (because I had removed their gym from the top of the cage for cleaning purposes), but the camera focused on Koko. It is such a shitty picture that I didn't feel like sharing it at the time, but now, it's all that I have left.

He was so beautiful.

I am in a quiet room.

I am in the birds that sing,

I am in each lovely thing.

The budgies don't even visit his cage anymore. They used to spend their days there, and now they sit in their own cage and mope around. I hadn't realized how much he meant to them too. Sometimes when they chirp, or sing, I wonder if they're thinking about him. He is indeed in each lovely thing. My memories of him are only good ones.

-Mortelle

I got most of the good!Yoko shots last night and figured that I'd share them. I've uploaded a few to Cos.com a few days ago, so in case you're watching that I'm sorry for the repeats. Credit for the lovely photos and wonderful editing goes to Alex


( Yay, Yoko pictures! )

Please forgive the two-posts in a day spam.

Clockwork Couture is my new best friend. I love the aesthetic of Steampunk but I don't like walking around the streets feeling like I'm wearing a costume (unless of course I am, in fact, wearing a costume). I enjoy watching steamfashion and seeing some of the crazy getups that people get into, but most of the time, for me, it's just too much flair. Same goes for Lolita - nice in theory, but I can't see myself wearing it. That being said, I'm a huge fan of Victorian/steam inspired clothing. For example, that hideous trend with the leggings that's going around like the plgue? Well, I got myself a pair that go down to my ankle, have a row of buttons along the side, and when worn with something like Oxfords look like a pair of long spats. I own a WW2-inspired pilot's jacket (the pattern was loosely based on an actual vintage design) with the collar completely reconstructed into something modern. That way I'm not walking around the streets in a Victorian gown with brass goggles on top of my head (not that there's anything wrong with that, it's just not my cup of tea), but I'm somehow incorporating the aesthetic into my wardrobe.

Back to Clockwork Couture - one might argue they're a cheap knock-off, but I found that for the prices that they charge I don't mind. I know close to nothing about historic fashion trends to begin with, I just know what I like and I'm comfortable with that.

Some of Clockwork's clothing is a little ridiculous, but every now and again they post some really amazing, decently-priced vintage-inspired-modern clothing that I really enjoy. And I mean, this is stuff I can wear around campus, feel good in, and not feel like I'm sticking out like a sore thumb. I guess the truest testament to how much I like them is that I bought four pieces from them already (and am waiting on two more) and I don't buy clothing online.

I'm giddy with anticipation for this to arrive:
( Awesomesauce jacket )

And speaking of being too-costumey, and having too much flair, here is the rest of the Tira shoot that I finally got around to finishing. Sorry the lighting looks really fake in some of them. Most of the photos were really dark and I did the best I could. Credit for the photos goes to w_stone.


( More here )

-Mortelle

I got my Tira!Shoot pictures from Alex =D While he's great at what he does (the framing is pretty damn awesomesauce on all of them), it's a real wake-up call to see myself on film. I thought the weight I gained since last summer was discrete, but it apparently isn't. So while I'm off raping Alex's works of art with PS in a vain attempt to make myself look thinner than I actually am (definitely running tomorrow), here, have a fine example of my excellent parenting skills:


I totally entrusted my eleven-year-old sister into Pedobear's excellent care. And people keep telling me to have kids someday, oh lol.

Psst, photo by Alex.

-Mortelle

I promised an entry that didn't revolve around sick animals, and here it is.



This little guy's face was lost in the mail for three months. I considered selling his body, but no one wants a Limho body without the faceplate, and Limhwa didn't want to sell me an extra faceplate. Just as soon as I had given up, his head showed up in a completely destroyed box. I sent him off to pikakao almost immediately and she re-did his face-up for me, I squealed and gushed, but then I got some birds and forgot all about him.

Poor thing, after being lost for so long, he really deserved a photo shoot.

( More Raf this way! )

-Mortelle

I really apologize for all the spam lately. But new camera and all, y'know? Please bear with me.


( You are the image of serenity. )

-Mortelle

My friend w_stone is designing a video game for a final project in his... video game design school (wow, I really know NOTHING about my friends, eh?!) and somehow he managed to get me to do his work for him

-__-;

Ahaha. I'm kidding - I don't mind. Basically he needed me to do some character sketches for him, so I'm gonna share. But before I do, I want to say thanks to all of those who left nice comments about a couple of sketches that I did a while ago, I think that was what inspired me to be a little less secretive about my art. I'm a really insecure artist, so this is difficult for me. I have to constantly hold back the urge to apologize for my art.

( Assassin... thing...( 2) )

-Mortelle

I took lots of photos today, but because of this goddamn DSL I cannot upload any of them to photobucket. It took me two hours of loading to get this one uploaded.

=( I guess I'll post them when I get home.

We went skiing on the most amazing hill today. It is so amazingly beautiful up there that I intend to bring my camera skiing with me tomorrow.

-Mortelle